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Good Inside by Dr. Becky Book Review:  5 Big Ideas and Adaptations for Kids with Autism by Dr. Mary Barbera

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Welcome to another exciting episode of the podcast!

Today, I’m excited to share my thoughts on a book that has been making waves in the parenting world—Good Inside by Dr. Becky Kennedy.

As someone who has spent decades working with children with autism, I’m always on the lookout for new perspectives that can help parents navigate the challenges they face. Since Good Inside is being coined as one of the top parenting books, especially in the gentle parenting space,  I knew I had to see what the hype was all about!

In this episode, I’ll review Good Inside, Dr. Becky’s book, and share the five big ideas I took away from it. I’ll also discuss how these ideas can be adapted for kids with autism or speech delays.

Whether you’re a parent or a professional, I hope you’ll find this discussion both insightful and practical.

You'll Learn

  • Insights from Good Inside by Dr. Becky Kennedy
  • Does Good Inside apply to autism parenting
  • 5 Takeaways and adaptations from Good Inside
  • Using Good Inside for kids with autism.

Good Inside Book Review

Good Inside by Dr. Becky Kennedy. Book Review

After reading Good Inside, I found that many of Dr. Becky Kennedy’s ideas align closely with my own approach to parenting and working with children who have autism. I can’t wait to share with you my exploration of five key concepts from the book, such as the importance of early childhood, the power of neuroplasticity, and understanding behavior as a window into a child’s needs.

After each of the 5 good inside book review concepts, look for my thoughts on how to adapt these strategies for children with developmental delays.

While I believe Good Inside is an excellent resource for all parents, I encourage those raising children with autism to consider additional, more structured approaches, especially those with lower expressive and receptive language abilities that can better meet their unique needs.
Using both mine and Dr. Becky’s books together can bring best results!

Good Inside Book Takeaways and Adaptations for Autism Parents

Dr. Becky’s approach, which emphasizes positive parenting and understanding the root causes of behavior, aligns closely with my own beliefs. However, as with most general parenting advice, there are specific adaptations needed when applying these concepts to children with autism or speech delays.

Here are five big ideas I took away from Good Inside, along with my thoughts on how they can be adapted for children with autism and other developmental delays.

1. The Early Years Matter

Dr. Becky emphasizes the critical importance of the early years, particularly from birth to age three, in shaping a child’s emotional and cognitive development. She points out that these years lay the foundation for a child’s attachment, trust, and overall well-being.
  • For Children with Autism: Early intervention is key. Engage your child in structured learning activities during most of their waking hours. Focus on teaching language, play skills, and daily living activities. Limiting screen time is crucial, and when screens are used, ensure they are part of a well-balanced, interactive learning environment. While Dr. Becky discusses this concept for everyone, it is even more important for those who need extra intervention.

2. It’s Not Too Late and Autism Guilt

One of the most encouraging ideas in Good Inside is that it’s never too late to make positive changes in your child’s development. Dr. Becky discusses neuroplasticity—the brain’s ability to adapt and learn throughout life—and encourages parents to embrace the potential for change at any age.

  • For Children with Autism: Whether your child is three, five, or older, don’t lose hope. With the right strategies, significant progress can be made. I’ve seen older children learn to talk for the first time and develop new skills, which reaffirms that it’s never too late to positively influence your child’s trajectory. I spent a lot of years dealing with autism guilt, thinking that if I did more sooner, my son would be doing better. We can’t change the past, and it is never too late to make progress so drop the autism parenting guilt!

3. Behavior as a Window

Dr. Becky views behavior as a window into a child’s inner world, suggesting that problematic behavior often stems from unmet needs or excessive stress. Instead of reacting with punishment, she advises parents to understand and address the underlying issues.
  • For Children with Autism: When you notice problem behaviors, consider whether the demands placed on your child are too high or if they’re receiving enough positive reinforcement. For children with autism, behavior often reflects communication challenges, so focus on reducing stressors and increasing support in ways that meet their specific needs.
  • We want to spend 95% of our time preventing problem behavior, so we want to look at the why behind what is happening and design strategies that can support our kids needs to prevent their need for big behaviors! I talk more about how to do this within my online courses.

4. Building Connection

One of Dr. Becky’s key strategies for fostering emotional health is to build strong connections with your child through dedicated, undistracted time together. She recommends “Play No Phone” (PNP) time, where parents set aside their devices to focus entirely on their child for 10-15 minutes daily.
  • For Children with Autism: This time is just as important, if not more so, for children with autism. However, you might need to structure these sessions more carefully, incorporating play that builds specific skills or is tailored to your child’s interests and developmental level. Reading books, joining in their type of play or having structured table sessions can be beneficial.
  • Giving your child choices during this time can also enhance their engagement and connection. If they cannot speak, you may give visual choices.

5. Managing Tantrums: Emotional vs. Aggressive

Dr. Becky distinguishes between emotional tantrums, which she views as normal and even healthy, and aggressive tantrums, which involve more serious behaviors like hitting or destroying property. She advises parents to hold firm boundaries while validating the child’s emotions.

  • For Children with Autism: While emotional outbursts can be typical, it’s important to focus on prevention strategies to minimize the occurrence of both emotional and aggressive tantrums. I also tend to not want to talk too much during problem behaviors about feelings and what can be done as most kids with autism are not responsive during these events.
  • Spend most of your time proactively addressing potential triggers and reinforcing positive behavior, while also being prepared to safely manage more severe outbursts.
  • Use my proven strategies like Rachel did to reduce her son’s hitting and throwing in just three days.

Good Inside By Dr. Becky Kennedy Summary

GoodInside Dr. Becky Kennedy. Instagram Following. Top Parenting Books
Make sure to follow Dr. Becky and myself @drmarybarbera on Instagram.

Reading Good Inside by Dr. Becky Kennedy has been an enlightening experience, reaffirming many of the principles I hold as both a parent and a professional. I am so pleased to see this as a top parenting book!

While her book offers valuable guidance for raising emotionally healthy children, it’s important to remember that children with autism or speech delays often require additional, more structured approaches. By adapting Dr. Becky’s insights to fit the unique needs of these children, we can help them achieve greater independence, emotional resilience, and overall well-being.

If you’re raising a child with autism, I highly recommend complementing Good Inside with resources specifically tailored to developmental delays, such as my own book, Turn Autism Around.

Resources

Free Workshop

Increase Talking &
Decrease Tantrums

in Young Children with

Autism &/or Speech Delays

Register for Free Training