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Regressive Autism and Learning How to Rebuild Skills with Ruth Cassell

  • Autism regression involves losing previously acquired skills, including words, gestures, eye contact, imitation, play, or social engagement.
  • Speech or developmental regression should be evaluated promptly. It can be associated with autism, but losing words does not automatically mean a child has autism.
  • Ruth noticed her son Elijah lose words and short phrases at around two and a half. Long waitlists delayed his level 3 autism diagnosis until he was nearly five, but Ruth continued seeking services and teaching him at home.
  • Ruth’s biggest breakthrough came when she moved from collecting free information to following a step-by-step plan based on Elijah’s strengths, needs, and foundational skills.

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Regressive Autism: What to Do When a Child Loses Words or Skills

Your toddler was saying words, looking toward you, or combining two or three words—and then those skills began to disappear.

Maybe the change seemed sudden. Maybe it happened so gradually that you questioned whether you were imagining it. Either way, seeing a child lose words, gestures, play skills, or social connection can be frightening.

This loss of previously acquired skills is often called developmental regression or autism regression. It should never be brushed aside as something to simply “wait and see.” It also does not mean that your child cannot learn, rebuild skills, or make meaningful progress.

Ruth Cassell’s son, Elijah, experienced a regression before he was diagnosed with level 3 autism. Ruth did what many determined parents do: she searched, listened, printed resources, secured services, and tried to put free strategies into action. She made some progress, but she eventually realized that information alone was not the same as having a step-by-step plan.

Her story offers two important lessons: act when a child loses skills, and make sure all the information and therapy surrounding your child are organized around the right priorities.

What Is Regressive Autism?

Regressive autism describes a pattern in which a child loses skills they previously used consistently. The loss may involve:

  • Spoken words or word combinations

  • Babbling or other vocalizations

  • Pointing, waving, or other gestures

  • Responding to their name

  • Eye contact or shared attention

  • Imitation and play skills

  • Social interest or engagement

  • Daily living skills

The American Academy of Pediatrics reports that approximately one-quarter of children with autism are reported to experience a regression in language or social skills, most commonly between 18 and 24 months. Researchers do not yet fully understand why regression occurs. A loss of milestones warrants medical and developmental evaluation, especially when the regression is late, sudden, severe, or accompanied by possible seizures or other neurological symptoms.

If your child has lost words or other skills, it is often something you should check in with your medical professional about. But, you should also learn how to start helping them right away regardless of the reason why.

Regression can be associated with autism, but a child losing speech does not automatically mean that autism is the cause. Hearing, sleep, illness, seizures, and other medical or developmental factors may need to be considered.

Ruth’s Story: When Elijah Began Losing Words

Ruth first noticed changes in Elijah when he was around two and a half. He had been using more words and putting two or three words together. Then those words went away.

She pushed for a developmental evaluation in late 2019, but even the shortest waitlist extended many months. When the pandemic disrupted services, the evaluation was pushed back again. Elijah was not diagnosed with level 3 autism until he was four years and eleven months old.

During that long wait, Ruth did not sit still. She found occupational therapy, secured school services through an IEP, watched videos, listened to podcasts, downloaded resources, and tried strategies at home.

In the original podcast interview below, Ruth and I discuss what Elijah’s regression looked like, how she navigated the wait for a diagnosis, and what began to change when she moved from collecting information to following an individualized plan.

Can Children Rebuild Skills After Autism Regression?

Regression is not a prediction of a child’s future.

Research following autistic preschoolers has found that children with a history of communication regression may show some early differences in language development, but those differences are not necessarily permanent. Every child’s profile and progress are different, so no one can promise a specific outcome. What parents can do is identify the skills that changed, establish a baseline, and begin teaching from the child’s current level.

When Ruth completed the Barbera Early Childhood Assessment® (BECA), she saw Elijah’s strengths and needs across language and learning, self-care, and problem behaviors. The assessment did not diagnose autism. It gave her a practical starting point.

After joining the Toddler & Preschooler Course and Community, Ruth learned how to:

  • Assess Elijah’s current skills

  • Choose priorities instead of trying everything at once

  • Build a teaching plan

  • Use short, positive teaching sessions

  • Practice skills during everyday routines

  • Track progress and adjust when something was not working

Within her first weeks of following the program, Ruth noticed more babbling, more attempts to communicate, and emerging words. One evening, while she was making dinner, Elijah unexpectedly repeated “biscuit”—a word she had never heard him say before.

That moment did not happen because Ruth found one perfect tip. It came after she began organizing her effort around assessment, foundational skills, repetition, and a clear plan.

The “Sea of Free”: When Helpful Autism Information Becomes a Trap

Ruth had listened to every episode of the Turn Autism Around podcast—more than 150 hours of free content at the time. She used what she learned to make progress with Elijah’s eating, sleeping, and potty training.

But his language remained limited, problem behaviors made teaching difficult, and Ruth was still trying to decide what to do next on her own.

I call this the Sea of Free: the overwhelming collection of podcasts, short videos, social posts, downloads, and advice that parents try to piece together without an individualized sequence.

Free autism resources can be valuable. Ruth’s own progress proves that. The problem is assuming that more information will automatically create a complete intervention plan.

When every video offers a different strategy, parents may:

  • Jump from one target to another

  • Work on skills that are too advanced

  • Miss foundational communication or imitation skills

  • Struggle to tell whether a strategy is working

  • Spend months consuming information instead of consistently implementing a plan

The real cost is not just frustration. It is time.

In the Newsletter 5 video below, I return to Ruth’s story and compare it with another mother, Kelsey, who faced a different problem: her son had funded therapy, but the therapy was not focused on his most urgent foundational needs.

Two Different Autism Traps with the Same Missing Piece

Ruth was drowning in useful information without a step-by-step plan.

Kelsey was doing everything the system asked. Her son was receiving funded ABA therapy, but the clinic was teaching colors before he could functionally request what he wanted or imitate. At home and in the community, he was darting away and banging his head on hard surfaces.

The problem was not that Ruth or Kelsey lacked love, effort, or commitment. The missing piece was a coordinated plan that began with the child’s current needs and carried over into daily life.

Therapy can be extremely helpful. Free information can also help parents get started. But neither should be treated as a box to check.

Parents need to understand:

  • What their child can and cannot do now

  • Which foundational skills should come first

  • What goals therapists are targeting and why

  • How to practice skills outside formal sessions

  • Whether the child is making measurable progress

  • When the plan needs to change

This is what I mean when I encourage parents to become the captain of the ship. You do not have to replace every professional or turn your home into a clinic. You do need enough understanding to help set priorities, coordinate the team, and make everyday interactions more supportive of learning.

Why Therapy Alone Is Rarely the Whole Plan

Young children are awake for roughly 100 hours each week. Even when a child receives many hours of high-quality therapy, much of life still happens with parents and caregivers—during meals, play, dressing, bath time, errands, and bedtime.

Those routines create repeated opportunities to build communication, cooperation, independence, and connection.

The goal is not to make every waking moment feel like work. The goal is to create a positive, child-friendly environment in which adults know how to notice communication, reinforce useful skills, prevent avoidable problems, and teach in small steps.

When parents and professionals use the same priorities and strategies, the child receives a clearer and more consistent learning experience across home, school, therapy, and the community.

What to Do If Your Toddler Loses Words or Other Skills

1. Document Exactly What Changed

Write down the words, gestures, play skills, and social behaviors your child used before. Note when you first noticed the change and whether it was sudden or gradual. Save relevant videos when available. Specific examples are more useful than saying only, “Something seems different.”

2. Request Medical and Developmental Evaluations

Tell your child’s pediatrician clearly that your child has lost previously acquired skills. Ask about hearing and appropriate developmental evaluation. Sudden, late, or unusual regression—or regression with possible seizures, changes in movement, or other neurological symptoms—may require additional medical assessment.

Do not wait for an autism diagnosis before starting intervention services. Start here

3. Establish a Current Baseline

Instead of focusing only on what your child used to do, identify what they can do independently today. Look across language and learning, self-care, and problem behaviors. A baseline helps you choose realistic priorities and measure change.

You can start with the free Barbera Early Childhood Assessment®. It is not an autism diagnostic tool, but it can help organize your observations and identify possible strengths and needs.

4. Prioritize Functional Communication

A child who cannot easily ask for what they want or need may cry, pull an adult, run away, or engage in unsafe behavior instead. Begin with communication that is useful and motivating for the child. Depending on the child, this may include speech, gestures, signs, pictures, or an augmentative and alternative communication system recommended by the child’s team.

5. Look at Foundational Skills

Before expecting answers to questions, colors, numbers, or longer phrases, assess skills such as engagement, matching, imitation, receptive language, and requesting. Ruth discovered that Elijah’s love of matching could become a strength she used to support other learning.

6. Align Home, School, and Therapy

Ask each professional what they are targeting, why the goal matters now, how progress is measured, and how you can support the skill at home. Share what works across settings. Ruth’s success helping Elijah use the bathroom at his clinic showed how powerful consistency can be when a parent helps the team understand the child’s prompts, routine, and reinforcers.

7. Use a Plan You Can Actually Implement

A strong plan should tell you what to teach first, how to teach it, what success looks like, and what to do when progress stalls. It should fit into real family life rather than depend on a parent perfectly recreating a therapy clinic at home.

Ruth’s Biggest Lesson: Move from Information to Implementation

Ruth was not passive before she joined a program. She was one of the most proactive parents I had ever met. She listened, learned, advocated, and kept backup plans ready because she knew services could change.

Her turning point was recognizing that she did not need another isolated strategy. She needed a roadmap.

That roadmap helped her decide what to work on, create a teaching space, carry skills into routines, collaborate with providers, and see progress she could identify and build upon.

If your child has experienced autism regression—or is simply not progressing in language, daily living skills, or behavior—the answer is not to blame yourself or wait for the perfect professional. Start by assessing where your child is today. Then create one coordinated plan that you, your family, and your child’s team can use consistently.

Take the Next Step

If you are worried that your toddler has lost words, stopped progressing, or is showing signs of autism, begin with the free Barbera Early Childhood Assessment®. In about 10 minutes, you can get a clearer view of your child’s strengths and needs across language and learning, self-care, and problem behaviors.

If you want a complete step-by-step system instead of trying to piece together free information, learn more about the Toddler & Preschooler Course and Community.

For individualized assessment, video review, and coaching with Dr. Mary Barbera and her team, learn more about High-Touch Coaching.

Regressive Autism and Learning How to Rebuild Skills with Ruth Cassell

Ruth Cassell on the Turn Autism Around Podcast

Ruth Cassell is the mother of Elijah, who has ASD. He was diagnosed with ASD level 3 in Sept. of 2021. Ruth calls herself a proactive person with multiple plans, as she is already advocating for services. She is a Financial Strategist, and just started her own business called Autism Strategist. The mission behind her business and these services are fueled by the difficulties she herself has gone through.

Resources

Frequently Asked Questions About Regressive Autism

Regressive autism refers to a pattern in which a child loses skills they previously used consistently. The loss may involve words, gestures, eye contact, social engagement, play, imitation, or daily living skills. Regression is associated with autism in some children, but a professional evaluation is needed to understand an individual child’s development.

Common signs include losing spoken words, using less language, stopping gestures such as pointing or waving, responding to a name less often, showing less social engagement, or losing play and imitation skills. The change may be sudden or gradual.

No. Speech loss can be associated with autism, but it can also have other developmental or medical explanations. A child who loses speech or other milestones should receive medical and developmental evaluation rather than being diagnosed based on one sign alone.

Autism-related language or social regression is most often reported during the second year of life, commonly around 18 to 24 months. However, the timing and pattern vary. Later or atypical regression may require additional medical investigation.

Children can learn, rebuild skills, and make meaningful progress after regression, but the pace and outcome are different for every child. Early evaluation, individualized goals, appropriate intervention, and consistent practice across everyday routines can help support development.

Document the words or skills your child lost and contact your pediatrician promptly. Ask about hearing, developmental evaluation, and early intervention. Mention clearly that this is a loss of previously acquired skills, especially if the change was sudden or accompanied by seizures or other neurological symptoms.

Therapy can be an important part of the plan, but progress is usually strongest when the goals match the child’s current needs and parents understand how to support those skills in daily routines. Parents and professionals should communicate regularly, measure progress, and adjust priorities when needed.