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Lessons about Turning Autism Around: An Interview with a Mom of 2 Young Boys with Autism

Autism Success Story: How One Mom Helped Her Two Sons Make Progress

What happens when your child is showing signs of autism, you’re waiting for answers, and the therapy you’re receiving doesn’t seem to be helping?

That’s exactly what Kelsey experienced as a single mom raising two young boys with autism.

Her oldest son, Brentley, was struggling with communication, serious head banging, and safety concerns. Despite traveling an hour each way to an ABA clinic, she wasn’t seeing the progress she desperately wanted.

Then Kelsey discovered my online courses and began learning how to teach Brentley herself.

Within approximately two months, she started seeing meaningful changes in his engagement, understanding of language, communication, and behavior.

In this rebroadcast of our original interview, Kelsey shares what she learned about early autism signs, advocating for her children, and why she believes parents need to be actively involved in their child’s progress.

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Early Signs of Autism: When Kelsey First Became Concerned

Kelsey first noticed something different about Brentley when he was just six months old.

He wasn’t consistently responding to sounds or to her voice. She wondered whether he had hearing difficulties, but his hearing tests came back normal.

Brentley continued to develop physically. He walked early and even began using a few words.

But after his first birthday, Kelsey began noticing changes.

His regression wasn’t sudden. Skills he had previously demonstrated seemed to come and go. He stopped responding to his name as consistently and became less engaged with people around him.

One of the biggest clues came when Kelsey looked at photographs.

Brentley had previously smiled for pictures and responded when she called his name. Now, she noticed he was often looking away and appeared less engaged.

He was also becoming increasingly upset during everyday activities.

According to the CDC’s list of early signs of autism, differences in responding to one’s name, pointing, social engagement, and communication can all be important developmental signs to watch for.

Kelsey knew something had changed, even though people around her suggested it might just be a phase.

This is an important reminder for parents: autism signs aren’t always obvious, and developmental regression can happen gradually.

If your child is losing words, responding less often to their name, or showing changes in communication or engagement, it’s worth discussing these concerns with their pediatrician.

Getting an Autism Diagnosis: Why Kelsey Had to Advocate

At approximately 18 months old, Brentley’s challenges became more concerning.

A friend who was a Board Certified Behavior Analyst introduced Kelsey to the M-CHAT-R/F autism screening questionnaire, an autism screening questionnaire for toddlers.

Brentley’s results indicated a high likelihood of autism, and Kelsey began pushing for a developmental evaluation.

But getting an appointment wasn’t easy.

She was initially told she would need to wait until Brentley was older. Instead of accepting that answer, she contacted a developmental pediatrician’s office directly and advocated for a referral.

Brentley was eventually diagnosed with autism at 25 months old.

During that time, Kelsey was also managing major changes in her personal life, raising two young children, and preparing to relocate from Alaska to Canada.

Looking back, one of her biggest realizations was that she could have started learning strategies to help Brentley while waiting for his evaluation.

A diagnosis can help families access services, but parents don’t need to wait for one to start learning how to support their child’s communication and development.

If you’re concerned about your toddler’s progress, my Barbera Early Childhood Assessment (BECA)® can help you identify important areas to work on.

When ABA Therapy Wasn’t Addressing the Biggest Concerns

After moving to Canada, Kelsey arranged ABA services for Brentley.

She drove approximately an hour each way to a program that provided several hours of therapy per week.

But Brentley was experiencing some very serious challenges.

He had limited functional communication and frequently became upset when routines changed or he couldn’t get something he wanted.

Kelsey reported that his head banging could happen up to 100 times per day.

He also had significant safety concerns, including running away unexpectedly.

These behaviors made ordinary activities, such as shopping or going for a walk, extremely difficult.

Yet Kelsey felt that the clinic was concentrating on goals such as teaching colors rather than prioritizing communication, safety, and the challenges affecting their daily lives.

She wanted to understand what the therapists were teaching and how she could help Brentley at home.

And that’s where her story began to change.

How Autism Parent Training Changed Everything

Kelsey found my online courses and started learning more about the verbal behavior approach to ABA.

She began watching teaching demonstrations, practicing strategies, and discovering ways to help Brentley become more engaged with her.

It wasn’t immediately easy.

At first, Brentley often ran away when she attempted teaching activities. Getting him to sit at a table or participate in learning was difficult.

But Kelsey learned to make teaching more enjoyable, build cooperation, and strengthen their relationship.

And that changed the way they interacted.

Instead of focusing only on what Brentley couldn’t do, she learned how to break skills into smaller, achievable steps and work on goals that mattered for their daily lives.

She also appreciated being able to watch the teaching demonstrations repeatedly.

Reading about a strategy was one thing. Actually seeing how to implement it helped her feel more confident.

For Kelsey, parent training wasn’t about replacing every professional. It was about learning how to help her son throughout the day.

What Progress Looked Like for Brentley

After approximately 60 days of applying what she had learned, Kelsey began noticing important improvements.

One of the biggest changes wasn’t a specific number of words or a test score.

It was Brentley’s willingness to engage with her.

He started spending more time interacting with his mom, participating in teaching activities, and following simple directions.

Kelsey also reported improvements in:

  • Functional communication: Brentley began requesting things he wanted and needed.

  • Receptive language: He became better at understanding and following simple instructions.

  • Engagement: He was more willing to participate in activities with his mom.

  • Problem behaviors: Kelsey became more confident preventing and responding to challenging situations, and many behaviors decreased.

  • Daily activities: Getting out into the community became easier and less stressful.

These changes didn’t happen overnight, and Brentley continued to need support, particularly for serious behaviors.

But Kelsey no longer felt completely helpless.

She was learning how to teach her son, recognize progress, and respond more effectively when challenges arose.

That knowledge made an enormous difference for their family.

Why Parents and Autism Professionals Need to Work Together

One of the most important parts of Kelsey’s story is that she eventually found behavior analysts who welcomed parent involvement.

These professionals helped develop individualized programs, addressed challenging behaviors, and supported Kelsey as she implemented teaching strategies at home.

She also had support for Brentley in his daycare environment.

This combination of parent education and individualized professional guidance helped the family continue working toward meaningful goals.

As a BCBA and autism mom myself, I believe collaboration between parents and professionals is incredibly important.

Parents know their children and spend time with them in countless everyday situations. Professionals can bring assessment skills, teaching expertise, and individualized behavior support.

When everyone works together, we can focus on meaningful progress in language, daily living skills, behavior, and independence.

For children experiencing severe head banging, aggression, elopement, or other dangerous behaviors, individualized professional assessment and support are especially important. Online education alone is not a substitute for that care.

Kelsey’s Biggest Advice to Parents of Children with Autism

Toward the end of our interview, I asked Kelsey what she would tell her younger self.

Her first piece of advice was simple:

“Don’t wait.”

Don’t wait until you have every answer before learning how to help your child.

Don’t assume that professionals can or should handle everything without your involvement.

And don’t forget to enjoy your child while working toward new skills.

Kelsey also shared a powerful reminder about parent advocacy:

“You need to become the captain of the ship.”

Her point wasn’t that parents have to become therapists or do everything alone.

It was that parents can learn, ask questions, advocate for appropriate goals, and become an active part of their child’s team.

During the interview, Kelsey also described how the experience led her to begin working as a behavior interventionist, helping other children and families.

Her story is a reminder that learning how to support your own child can create lasting confidence and hope.

What If Your Child Has Autism or Is Showing Signs?

If you’re worried about your toddler’s development, struggling with language delays, or feeling frustrated because progress is slow, I want you to know that there are practical steps you can begin taking.

You don’t have to figure everything out alone.

I recommend starting with two resources:

1. Take the Barbera Early Childhood Assessment (BECA)®

This brief assessment can help you understand your child’s current skills in language and learning, self-care, and problem behaviors.

Start the BECA Assessment

2. Watch My Free 28-Minute Workshop

I’ll walk you through four steps to start increasing talking and decreasing tantrums in young children with autism or signs of autism.

Watch the Free Workshop Now

Frequently Asked Questions About Autism, Early Intervention, and Parent Training

Early signs of autism may include not responding consistently to their name, limited pointing or gestures, delayed speech, reduced social engagement, repetitive behaviors, or losing previously acquired skills. In Kelsey’s case, she first noticed that Brentley wasn’t responding to sounds consistently. Later, she noticed changes in his language, engagement, and behavior. If you’re concerned about your toddler, learn more about early signs of autism and the M-CHAT screening tool.

No. You don’t need to wait for a formal autism diagnosis to begin helping your child develop communication, play, and learning skills. Kelsey spent months waiting for evaluations and later realized she could have started learning strategies much sooner. If your toddler has speech delays or signs of autism, start by taking my Barbera Early Childhood Assessment (BECA)® to identify your child’s current strengths and areas needing support. Continue pursuing appropriate professional evaluations and services at the same time.

If your child isn’t making meaningful progress, review the treatment goals with your child’s therapy team. Are they prioritizing functional communication, safety, daily living skills, and the behaviors affecting your family most? Kelsey became frustrated when Brentley’s therapy focused on colors while his severe head banging and communication difficulties continued. Parents should be active participants in treatment decisions and regularly review progress with providers. Learn more about how to find quality autism therapy and what to look for in an effective program.

Yes! Parent training can help families build communication, engagement, and learning opportunities into everyday routines. After learning my teaching strategies, Kelsey reported that Brentley began following simple directions, requesting things he wanted, and interacting with her more frequently. These improvements also helped make their daily lives easier. If you’d like to learn practical strategies you can start using with your own child, watch my free 28-minute workshop on increasing talking and decreasing tantrums.

The first step is understanding why the behavior may be happening, including possible communication difficulties, environmental triggers, discomfort, or medical concerns. Kelsey described Brentley banging his head as many as 100 times per day before she found more effective support. Learning to improve communication and prevent challenging situations helped her family, but severe self-injurious behaviors require individualized professional assessment and a safety plan. For additional strategies, read my article about autism tantrums and other challenging behaviors.

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